Friday, March 21, 2008

Good Friday, Fr. Leo and St. Teresa of Avila, and Old Friends.

Happy Good Friday to all! I hope everyone who wasn't stuck at home (like me) had a chance to attend Mass today or at least thought of what today symbolized. I, unfortunately, didn't get a chance to get out today but I did spend (and will spend more) time contemplating about what the meaning of Lent is and why Easter is a great day. It's actually one of my favorite "holidays". Because I am a bit out of it today (lack of sleep yesterday and part of today makes one a bit loopy), I won't write more on the subject but hopefully I will be able to write something worth reading for Easter. I am making no promises though.

One thing that isn't helping how "blah" I am feeling is the summer weather we've been having lately. Spring has just begun but it's already pretty hot. It reminds me of late May, it's so warm. It's expected to be around the mid-80s this weekend. Yeah, it's crazy. Hopefully, the weather we've been experiencing isn't wreaking havoc of people's allergies. It's not exactly causing me too much problems but it might be what's causing me so feel so out of it. I am blaming lack of sleep, first and foremost, but I think the high pollen or hot weather might be causing me some fatigue. Sunny California sometimes is too sunny. lol.

I don't really have much going on lately. I am, more than ever, ready to go back to school. I'm going to take a few days to soul search about things that are going on in my life... which all comes back to how strong my faith is and thinking of ways I can strengthen it. As I continue to read St. Teresa of Avila's autobiography, and especially after my chat with Fr. Leo, I came to a fork in the road. I thought that I could take the road I was taking before -- feeling like I really can't do anything because the anxiety has been debilitating me. Or, if I take Fr. Leo's advice and a cue from St. Teresa, I could quit thinking that I will never get better and do something about it. I've decided to take the second road -- the one which is harder but will be more worthwhile. And, I've actually started down the road.

For the first time in a very long time, I had friends over. Well, technically one friend that I hadn't seen in about 2 and a half years. She is the first friend I've had over to simply hang out (I'm not counting the friends I had over one evening last Spring but that was to do an English Lit project). It was absolutely wonderful to see her again. Whoever said that having a solid support system behind you, especially when you're sick, was absolutely right. I felt like my old self and for that, I was and am truly grateful. :) This single event has made me realize just how blessed I am to have the friends I have now and I feel like I have even more excuses to get better -- physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. I highly recommend surrounding yourself with friends, it's wonderful. :)

Alright, well, that's it for tonight. As I've said, I'm a bit out of it (darn the wacky sleep schedule), super tired and I have too much going on in my mind due to the big creative kick I am on (lots of writing for my novel) so I should get to it. As always, thanks for reading and God Bless.

P.S. Have I ever recommended reading St. Teresa's autobiography? If I haven't, I do now! If you can, I encourage you to read it. It's an amazing book. :)

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